Why Can’t Women Have it All?!

If you are a fan of the TV show Scandal as known as the Olivia Pope show, you would notice that the show has been highlighting important issue that women face all the time but unfortunately are not discussed enough.

The scenes that inspired me to write this article were the scenes where Olivia Pope & Mellie Grant, two women in powerful career positions, find themselves obligated to eliminate their romantic lifefor the sake of their career and position of power, against their own will. On many occasions you would see Mellie complained about the lack of a romantic/sexual life and how lonely it feels to be a woman at the top

What shocked me the most, was when Olivia went to her Dad (Rowan) for advice, and he bluntly told her that she could not afford to have career in the White House and entertain a serious relationship at the same time. Rowan proceeded with telling his daughter that it is a lonely path but she has to suck it up and take it. Really tho?!

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Mellie Grant & Olivia Pope

 Does it really have to be like that ? I mean why can’t women have it all? I know you are probably rolling your eyes thinking “Relax, it’s just a show”. But no it is not just a show, these are real questions we ask ourselves as women in this day and age.

I am aware that being a working woman and while trying to balance your personal and social life is not a easy thing to do, especially if you are a working Mom. But to deny yourself of what you’ve been longing for (relationship, marriage, or family) for the sake of a career or power, is extreme

Lady, you can have it all if you want. It just depends on what your “All” entails. If your “All” consist of being a corporate woman, happily married with 2-3 children, a couple businesses on the side, guess what? You can do it!   Now I agree with those who say you can’t do it alone, you need strong support system. And You may not find the perfect balance while juggling all of this; but that’s OK. I heard many working Moms say something like “there is no such thing as perfectly balanced life.” Some days are good, some are bad. 

There are other women whose “All”  consist of a fulfilling career, financial stability,  and a personal life that doesn’t include marriage or having children. Shonda Rhimes the Creator of the Scandal herself, made it very clear in an (interview with Oprah Winfrey) that she never wants to get married. She stated that she never aspired to be married and so she made the choice. Other women like Jeannie Mai from the talk show The Real, made it clear they don’t want to have children. I respect women like them who know what their “All ” is and who make their choice and are happy with it. I love it seeing women stand up for what they want.

For the rest of us who want relationship + children + career + money + power,  I am saying we can try to have it all.  Having it all doesn’t mean being perfect in every area of our life. And there will be sacrifices we will need to make as a working Moms and Wives. But I rather try to have my “All” than to regret it later on in life.  And what I firmly disagree with, is the fact we should totally to eradicate an important aspect of our life against our own will in order to make it to the top as career women.

It is a personal choice matter!

Do not let society pressure you into playing what they see is the role of women.  It is about what you want for yourself. Allow yourself to live the life you’ve always wanted. Don’t deny yourself of what will make you happy as a woman.

What do you think? Should a career woman deliberately terminate their romantic life to make it to the top?

***Sonia Francine***

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